It's been so very long since it happened. My world was tipped upside down. I'm not afraid to write this, zero backlash, because who the hell is gonna even read it? I know she won't.

I tried moving on, breaking away from Alyssa, because I felt like I should blame her for taking Haleigh away from me. Even though Haleigh's body became the vessel for Alyssa. The same person really. To me, two different people: one who won the battle, and the other is dead. My love, my sweet living dead girl, is gone...and dead. I've tried moving on from that, but her zombie still walks the earth, basking in the worldly thralls.

And now she's married. She belongs to someone else. I think she found her long lost twin. She's happy now. Happier than I could've made her. I now have to sever the tether even worse now, more than I tried before. I know I had my chances of reconciliation, but why be with Alyssa? Alyssa could never be fully satisfied with me. Same went for me. She wasn't Haleigh anymore.

I just wish I had one last chance, one last chance...to say goodbye to her. To Haleigh. I tried telling Alyssa how much I miss Haleigh, but she misunderstood. "I miss Haleigh so much," and she said, "I miss you too." I wasn't talking to the same person. She didn't understand.

So. Here it goes. She's dead, but still. This is it.

"Goodbye Haleigh. I love you. I loved you so much and still do. But you're dead. Maybe when I die, we'll be together again."

I know she'll be happy. No doubt in my mind. But now I ask, where do I go? What do I do? I won't keep this unnecessary connection with her zombie. It just fuels the hellfire inside. So now I push on, harder now than before. There ain't no going back. Ahead is a cold horizon where storm clouds cluster. I go it alone. I drag with me chains of weights and heavy spikes that dig into the dirt.

This is the closing chapter in a very long, drawn-out, painstaking era in my life. And all I can taste is the drowning waters. Like cold acid. I feel that I am frozen and I can't break free from this cage.

All I see is black. Endless realms of black. Here I stand, at the center. Deafened. Blinded. Asphyxiated. I don't know if I'll ever rise to the surface for air. Because I know there's nothing up there. All I can say to everyone is farewell.

Farewell, everyone. I gave it my all, but what I got ain't enough. Never will be.

Farewell. Eternally. Farewell.